By Allison Evans Counseling & Consulting, PLLC
Samantha Allison-Evans, M.A., LPC
At Allison Evans Counseling & Consulting, PLLC, we believe that healing begins from within—and that one of the most powerful paths to healing is self-compassion. Many of the emotional struggles our clients face—anxiety, depression, low self-worth—are deeply rooted in negative core beliefs. These are the unconscious assumptions we carry about ourselves, others, and the world. Understanding and transforming them, paired with a consistent self-compassion practice, can change the way we think, feel, and respond to life’s challenges.
🌱 What Are Core Beliefs?
Core beliefs are the deeply held convictions we form—often in childhood or through major life experiences—that shape how we see ourselves and interpret the world. These beliefs can be positive (“I’m capable,” “People can be trusted”) or negative (“I’m unlovable,” “I always mess things up”). They act like internal filters, influencing how we interpret events and respond emotionally.
In therapy, especially in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), we work to uncover and challenge unhelpful core beliefs. Why? Because when left unchecked, these beliefs can fuel harmful cycles of self-criticism, avoidance, and emotional distress.
💛 Why Self-Compassion Matters
If you’ve ever said to yourself, “I should’ve done better,” or “Why can’t I just get it right?”—you’re not alone. These thoughts are common, but they can be damaging. Self-compassion helps us soften the blow of failure, acknowledge our pain without judgment, and treat ourselves with the same kindness we’d show a friend.
8 Practical Ways to Practice Self-Compassion
1. Speak to Yourself Kindly
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Monitor Your Inner Critic: Pause and ask yourself, “Would I speak to a friend this way?”
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Use Supportive Language: Try saying, “I’m learning and doing my best. Mistakes are part of growth.”
2. Normalize Struggle
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Everyone goes through hard times. Remind yourself, “I’m not alone in this.” Knowing others have felt similarly can ease feelings of shame or isolation.
3. Practice Mindfulness
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Name the Emotion: “I’m feeling overwhelmed right now.” Naming it can reduce its intensity.
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Body Awareness: Check for physical signs of stress—tight shoulders, racing heart—and respond with calming strategies like deep breathing.
4. Offer Yourself Comfort
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Self-Soothing Gestures: Place a hand over your heart or hug yourself.
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Positive Mantras: “May I be gentle with myself,” or “I deserve kindness and rest.”
5. Reframe Mistakes
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See Mistakes as Teachers: Instead of thinking “I failed,” try “What can I learn from this?”
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Celebrate Small Wins: Acknowledge progress, even in small steps.
6. Seek Connection
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Talk it Through: Share with a trusted friend or therapist.
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Community Support: Join support groups to connect with others facing similar experiences.
7. Set Healthy Boundaries
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Honor Your Energy: Say “no” when needed and protect your peace.
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Schedule You-Time: Even 10 minutes of rest or reflection matters.
8. Be Patient with Yourself
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Take Small Steps: Self-compassion takes practice, especially if you’re used to being your own harshest critic.
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Track Your Progress: Journaling or repeating daily affirmations can keep you grounded.
🌼 A Final Word
Healing isn’t about being perfect—it’s about showing up for yourself with gentleness, courage, and understanding. At Allison Evans Counseling & Consulting, PLLC, we’re here to walk beside you as you challenge outdated beliefs, build new thought patterns, and practice radical self-kindness.
By combining core belief work with intentional self-compassion, you can rewrite your inner narrative—and begin to thrive, not just survive.
Ready to get started?
Reach out to schedule your next therapy session or learn more about how we can support you at Allison Evans Counseling & Consulting, PLLC.
You are worthy of the same kindness you offer others.
Samantha Allison- Evans, M.A., LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor
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